addicted to
endorphins
pain
exhaustion
chasing this insane dream
perfection




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i'm not here to win

i'm here to leave a legacy

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sick again

if you were to ask me, "how do you feel today?"
i would say, "like shit"

okay so i probably don't know what shit feels like. but i can tell it's brown, squishy, gets stepped on by many, stinks, and probably does not feel very good about itself.

yes, so i am sick. again. just less than a month ago i was feeling this exact same way. same symptoms too. fever, sore throat, chronic runny nose, giddyness. agh okay i've been resting since sat? didn't train for three days already, starting to feel very fat and unfit and sick. back to me resting... i thought i'd be okay by today. esp since i missed nus tri (argh) to rest. but today, i woke up feeling horrible. very horrible. fever had gone up and my throat was completely swollen. eww. yes so i was allowed to stay home. went to see the doctor after that. and while waiting, i finally managed to see my cousin on tv. he hosts the cna morning thingum that i don't normally get to watch cos i go to school. heh. so yes finally got to see him there. seems like the girl talks more than him. and his voice sounds majorly different on tv compared to real life. haha if ur wondering who "he" is, look out for the surname. rah okay after waiting, doctor said that my throat was super swollen. so he gave me antibiotics for that. and something else for my fever. and some other thing for my swollen eye. then i walked back home. and slept.

had to go off to changi airport to get the bike box after that. felt so giddy and carsick. uh then when we got there, the counter was closed. so we went for lunch at suntec marche. i felt so giddy still and wasn't hungry at all. so ate quite little. (thankfully) then came home with a new helmet (my reward for passing math). quite like it. the others were like 300bucks plus! crazy. so i got mine for 70bucks. it's blue. it fits quite okay. it's nice la. at least i know i'm wearing something that won't crack if i fall off my bike. the previous one was cracking pretty bad. just dropping it onto the ground would cause a whole chunk of it to come off into pieces.

came home, slept. woke up periodically because of i don't know why. my throat is feeling horrid still. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. sigh i must get better soon! must get better.

-throws up on keyboard. sigh. okay ta i will try to do work. so giddy.

[pat]* decided to runaway-.

it's the passion that drives you